If your friend says to you ‘You’re being mean, you need to get laid,’ your problem is not sex. Your problems are that you might be acting like an asshole and your friends are definitely idiots. I have lived twenty-five years in this body by myself, and I feel pretty confident that, by now, my personality is staying as it is. I’m going to stay a little uptight and anxious. I’m going to continue enjoying plans and Post-its and clean, orderly spaces. And though nobody has been dumb enough to say anything close to ‘You need to get laid’ to my face, I resent the idea that anyone might think, if they knew my history, that I’d be slightly different by virtue of having a penis - however briefly - inside me. That is some phallocentric bullshit if I ever heard any. Hypothetical penises don’t make the rules I make the rules. I love the rules.

Never Have I Ever by Katie Heaney

teachthemhowtothink:

merkkultra:

do men have resting bitch faces as well or do they not have negative characteristics ascribed to them for putting on a neutral rather than a deliriously happy facial expression

whoa

(via valeriewontcomeonover)

valkubus:

mycroftsbooty:

shslspookyscary:

adropofred:

comment s’appelle un chien qui vend des médicaments?

un pharmachien

why the fuck is this joke in french and why there is 26k notes am i missing something important

something really important

what do you call a dog that sells drugs?

a pharmacy

yeah it’s really only funny in french

(via lethalpazzle)

One day, whether you
are 14,
28 
or 65

you will stumble upon
someone who will start
a fire in you that cannot die.

However, the saddest,
most awful truth
you will ever come to find––

is they are not always
with whom we spend our lives.

Beau Taplin, “The Awful Truth”  (via coffeekaling)

(Source: afadthatlastsforever, via thingssheloves)

Seeing someone read a book you love is seeing a book recommend a person.

Reddit user coolstoryreddit  (via baublebobby)

(Source: communified, via lethalpazzle)

unskinny:

Stop apologizing for the things you enjoy eating.

Stop apologizing for the things you enjoy wearing.

Stop apologizing for how you prefer to spend your day.

Stop apologizing for the things that make you happy.

(via -collateraldamage)

overcomethisworldwithlove:

irizzari7:

Haven’t quite mastered the being cute thing yet.

Omg. What a babe.

Holy…

overcomethisworldwithlove:

irizzari7:

Haven’t quite mastered the being cute thing yet.

Omg. What a babe.

Holy…

Summer

I love the smell of rain
when it hits hot pavement.
It’s the smell of my childhood,
of Miami afternoons,
of loving you.
And so it is,
every time the weather gets warm
I think of you.
Every year, a little older,
every memory a little more faded,
I learn different lessons
from the same old heartbreak.

This year I remember 
how right I am to wait.
Because I want a love like ours.
I want someone to blow my mind,
to feel so enraptured
that I can’t imagine any other way.
I want to fall into someone completely,
and adore the ways they’re weird.
And I want to feel safe,
and loved as though there is no other option.
And remembering you
makes me prefer being alone
until I die,
if the only other choice
is a love less than that. 

I no longer have the energy for meaningless friendships, forced interactions or unnecessary conversations. If we don’t vibrate on the same frequency there’s just no reason for us to waste our time. I’d rather have no one and wait for substance than to not feel someone and fake the funk.

Don’t plant your bad days. They grow into weeks. The weeks grow into months. Before you know it, you got yourself a bad year. Take it from me - choke those little bad days. Choke ‘em down to nothing.

Tom Waits   (via zooeyglasses)

(Source: victoriouscorvid, via zooeyglasses)

tastefullyoffensive:

[nationofamanda]
girlshbo:

via jellodan

Sometimes you need to burn bridges to stop yourself from crossing them again.

L. Gabriel (via abluesforbrklyn)

always reblog

(via spookie-delights)

(via valeriewontcomeonover)

We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It’s one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it’s another to think that yours is the only path.

Paulo Coelho (via lazyyogi)

(Source: lazyyogi)